Pregnancy is Beautiful

People say when a woman gets pregnant she has a “glow”. They also say that prenatal vitamins are great for your hair and nails. The “glow” is purely an opinion, but there is supposed to be science behind the hair and nails. Unless you are me.

I don’t glow. I sweat, but I don’t think you can count that as a glow. My bright red zits covering my face, neck, chest and back might give off a glow, but I don’t think that is exactly what they are talkin about either. I wish I had a glow about me. I have always been jealous of those cute pregnant ladies that totally own it. They are rockin their pre-pregnancy pants, long shiny hair blowing behind them as the walk, illuminating every place they go in to. Unfortunately for me, the only thing blowing behind me is my BO as I waddle around, confused, and picking at my face.

Science must really hate me too. My prenatals are not giving me those hard as rock nails and strong thick hair. Instead, my nails peel and break just as much as before, and I have been shedding. I am totally screwed for the PP shed. I have a feeling a just may actually go bald. As it is, I have to clean my brush out after every use now. What is up with that?!

My glow stinks, my nails peel, and I’m already balding. No, I am not one of those pregnant people.